On the bandwagon

Here goes:

Tina's self proclaimed horoscope.

You will come in contact with a stranger who will introduce himself as Mr.X.. Mr X. will advise you to withdraw your life savings in quarters and open a rubber ball vending machine franchise. You will do this and will make sure that you choose orange and green bouncy balls for the machines. On one of these balls, you will draw a smiley face, along with the words "Caveat Emptor". On the 3rd Monday of the 3rd month of the year of your 25th birthday, you will add this ball to a random machine and publicly announce a contest under the guise of "Bounce your way to Burma". You will explain the contest as follows, the lucky recipient of the "smiley" ball will win an all expense paid trip to Burma on a private jet, sponsored by Burma Air. On this private jet you will load all that's left of the green and orange bouncy balls, as Burma is notorious for the dealings of paddles on the black market and you have just realized the perfect cross-sell item. Sending the "winner" along is the perfect cover to get your merchandise to Burma on a sponsored jet, subsequently selling your wares on the black market for a hefty sum. You wait for a winner to emerge. You wait. You wait. You wait some more. You then realize that you forgot to put the ball with the smiley into one of the machines in the first place. You curse silently and decide to just stick the ball into the ball slot of one of your machines and give some hooligan a free chance at winning. The next day a winner emerges. It is a homeless man who was living in the bathroom next to the machine. You send this man to Burma, along with the massive cargo. This man discovers your plan and when he arrives in Burma, completely takes over the operation, along with the massive profits accrued from the sale of paddle/ball kits. You mourn for 3 weeks at the loss of your would-be fortune and then you recieve a suspiciously shaped envelope in the mail. You open it and and are amazed to see an orange bouncy ball with a smiley face on it. You turn it over and read the malicious words scribbled on the back, "CAVEAT EMPTOR". This time, however, there is more enscryption. The ball is signed "Mr. X". Oh yeah...Mr. X. is a Miami Hurricanes fan.

Tomorrow you will get a pony.

Sounds about right

Sunday, November 26, 2006
Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)

This is a rather moody time for you and your changeability has had its impact on those close to you, too. Still, it's crucial to keep expressing your feelings, regardless of the resistance you might receive from others. Let your shifting needs register on the surface, for others will see through your attempts to hide them anyway.

Paint your wagon

Well, not a wagon exactly. I've taken on the task of painting my room a less intense color than the ever so delightful pepto bismo pink with forest green trim. Yeah...my mom tried. She tried. So I will go about priming and painting until I have a calm soothing color. I'm thinking either a shade of blue or olive green. Maybe I'll start a whole Feng Shui thing and get some candles and check my auras to make sure they are organized correctly. Or maybe I'll just slap a coat of paint on the walls and call it a day. Lots to think about. Hmmmm....

Saturday

Our neighborhood is hosting a garage sale and I swear this is the most people I've seen outside EVER. And apparently a bunch of them know Shadow, probably from staring at him through their windows while he graciously poops on their lawn. That dog. He has no manners. I introduced him to a couple of people and what does he do? He goes straight for the crotch. Come on, dog! I can't take him anywhere!!